PLAY#12

CASCADING OAK LEAVES BEYOND MY WINDOW ON THE WORLD… SO SOFT THE WIND TO WINTER. WHAT NEXT ? THE INEVITABLE FALL OF SNOW OR WORSE THE WINTRY STORMS OF ICY RAIN. EVEN THE RESOLUTE WAIVER AT THE WINTER’S WORST. I’VE BEEN TOLD THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS BAD WEATHER JUST A BAD CHOICE OF CLOTHING… I DISSENT AGAINST SUCH PATENT NONSENSE.

THIS IS THE NECESSARY TICK OF THE YEAR’S CLOCK… BUT SOMETIMES I HANKER AFTER THE WARMTH OF LESS TEMPORATE SHORES, RIGHT NOW HOT AND SUNNY WOULD BE A BOOST.

DALE M

TODAY’S PLAYLIST

The urge to make a break for it and hide out in the forest is so enticing even though it’s patently an impossible dream. Society has deserted the higher ground, politicians are becoming so Machiavellian they wouldn’t recognise truth if it slapped them around the head. We are living in the V for Vendetta world, constantly lied to and eventually corralled into camps. It is a future which I don’t want any part of, so I hanker for a den in the middle of a forest… we have no mountains here were we can hold out like partisans, but the forest could be made habitable and we could live like merry men…

Don’t think my body will respond kindly to the weather or the physical effort required, so I will stay here in my room and watch other people do it on you tube.

Dale M

PLAY#11

Some nights the solitude surrounds you like chlorine gas, and the only antidote is alcohol. Of course this is not the answer, for the morning is a fractured prism of pain and half remembered dreams. The chasm of reality can only be approached bit by bit, a braincell at a time.

No good feeling sorry for yourself. The day is spearing in through the window and it is later than you think. Whiskey is a fine fair weather friend, but mornings are not for him.

Dale M

PLAY#10

OK EVERYBODY I’M OFFICIALLY IN RECOVERY!

My counsellor was very happy, as I had improved by 11 points on my weekly questionnaire. So mental health is judged by the way you answer a bloody questionnaire. Funnily enough, I didn’t share her enthusiasm. All the questionnaire showed was that I could temper the results to stop her thinking I’m suicidal. Anyone with a modicum of common sense, could achieve such wonderful results. I felt cheated, but I guess the counselling service is primarily provided to stop suicides, so I guess that worked then. I was never suicidal I just wanted to understand how I could get out of my mind fog.

So I tempered my results to avoid the suicidal tendencies she was so concerned about. I was concerned that she might refer me to the police…

So now, I have a fortnight until my next session and if I continue to make these great strides towards normality I will be signed off.

So the state pays lip service to mental health but in the end it just amounts to ticking boxes. It’s not her fault though, she has no psychiatric qualifications, she is just a counsellor, a nodding dog in the back of the car.

I’m very frustrated because I had hoped for more, for insight into the way my mind works.

Oh well back to the drawing board.

Dale M

PLAY #9

Monday again, and the prospect of further revelations in my therapy session… I’m feeling like shit today, my son has covid, my ex-wife potentially has bowel cancer, all in all just another same ole week in this awful year. Las Palmas volcano threatens to shed its slopes into the ocean, and the world crunching tsunami is just around the corner.

But mainly I’m concerned about myself. The revealing in therapy may crush my nascent recovery, too many big words… oh well, lets strap on a fake smile on go thru this shit one more time.

Dale M

SUNDAY#8 PLAYLIST

THE CLOCKS HAVE GONE BACK AND ALL WE CAN DO IS MOURN THE PASSING OF ANOTHER SUMMER. MAKE LIKE A DORMOUSE AND CREATE A WARM NEST, SLEEP AND EAT THE NUTS YOU HAVE GATHERED. IT IS THE AUTUMNAL VERSION OF GOOD FRIDAY, ONLY WE DONT HAVE TO WAIT TWO DAYS FOR SALVATION BUT DEATH DEFYING MONTHS OF MIST AND RAIN, SNOW AND COLD, A YAWNING ACHE OF TIME BEFORE DELIVERANCE.

IT IS A PERFECT PATHETIC FALLACY OUTSIDE, MISTY AND WINDY WITH YELLOWING LEAVES FALLING FROM THE OAK TREE. A DAY TO ROLL OVER AND DREAM SOME MORE OF BRIGHTER TIMES.

DALE M

HALLOWEEN PLAYLIST

GOING A BIT EARLY ON THIS ONE, JUST IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS A HALLOWEEN PLAYLIST FOR A PARTY.

IT’S NOT A TRADITION THAT MY GENERATION HAVE VERY MUCH TIME FOR, AS THE TRICK OR TREAT MOTIF WAS AMERICAN MORE THAN BRITISH. AS KIDS, WE WERE MORE LIKELY TO GO AROUND ASKING FOR A PENNY FOR THE GUY. THE GUY IN QUESTION WAS A FLAMMABLE MODEL OF GUY FAWKES, WHO WOULD BE PUT ON TOP OF OUR BONFIRES. THE CASH DONATED WOULD BE USED TO BUY FIREWORKS.

I WAS NEVER VERY FOND OF FIREWORKS, LOCAL DISPLAYS HELD IN GARDENS, WERE DESULTORY AT BEST, BUT THERE WAS OTHER FARE ASSOCIATED WITH THE CELEBRATION. THINGS LIKE TOFFEE APPLES WHICH WERE SOMETHING I COULDN’T STOMACH. AN APPLE ON A STICK DIPPED IN TO TOFFEE WHICH WOULD SET HARD.

MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE WAS THE BAKED POTATOES WHICH WE MADE BY WRAPPING THE POTATO IN FOIL AND THEN COOKED ON THE BONFIRE. THEY WERE USUALLY OVER COOKED BUT IT WAS EXCITING TO COOK OUR OWN FOOD.

THESE LOCAL TRADITIONS HAVE BEEN LOST TO THE INVASIVE AMERICANISM WHICH IS TRICK OR TREAT.

TIMES AND TRADITIONS CHANGE, I’D QUITE LIKE THE FIREWORK TRADITION TO BE DOWNPLAYED BUT KIDS LOVE BANGS…

OH WELL

DALE M

PLAY#7

FEEL LIKE A RADIO-ACTIVE ISOTOPE TODAY… WELL PAST MY HALF-LIFE! WHAT IS IT ABOUT THE NIGHT, BEEN UP FOR HALF OF IT WITH A PAINFUL SHOULDER/NECK, YET WHEN I GET UP IT DISAPPEARS. FREYA IS ENTRANCED BY AUTUMNWATCH AT THE MOMENT, SHE SITS DEEP IN CONCENTRATION WATCHING ALL THE ANIMALS AND BIRDS… NEVER KNOWN A DOG SO INTERESTED IN TELEVISION AS SHE IS. ELLIE IS NOT EVEN VAGUELY INTERESTED IN THE TV, SHE JUST LIES NEXT TO ME WITH HER HEAD IN MY LAP SNORING LOUDLY.

DALE M